Who Will Always Be My Side At All Times???

haiz... i think overall only smoking and kill all my thinking of being alone... haiz... she told mi that she is different from all my ex... haiz... do i think is there any different... haiz... i guess is the same lor... haf to go home early to had dinner with family, cant stay out late... haiz... i noe la... u all haf a family who love and family to love... i gt nth... haiz... i thought tt i will be happy after going out with her... but now i guess no more le... i wonder why am i so stupid... only find gf from my school... only school time with her... den after school send her home... other den tt... nth... lyk tt very happy meh... haiz... i also wan to be love and to love someone... but who.. who will give mi the love tt i wan... haiz... sometime i cross the road without looking out for cars... cause i juz hope tt one very cool car juz knock mi down... since i cant get the love on earth... might as well i go and get my love in hell... haiz... argh... im going crazy le la... i rather keep quiet den to talk now... haiz... let mi emo ba... haiz...