Leaving The World Today

im back after more den 1 month... since so many ppl miss mi... i should post ba... haha... working for the past few weeks but money dun noe go where... haiz... nvm la... today off... dun noe tml working or nt... haiz... so boring sia... juz now help my bro to move his stuff to his new place... den ltr maybe at night i going out with him and fat ma ma... or else i will be damn damn sian... haiz... im fucking bored sia... school reopen le... everyone busy at school and i will be busy at work le... wahaha... but confirm nt everyday work de... so wad should i do when im nt working... haiz... anyone wants to watch movie (ong bak 2) with mi??? my headache is back le... haiz... i hate it... wonder wad if there's blood clot in my head??? haiz... die die lo... doesnt really matters anyway... wahaha... shall stop here... will post when i haf the time... i dun noe did i dreamt of joscelin this morning or nt... but it look so real... omg... but i noe it wont haf the chance to even dream of her le.... i also dun care... cause im leaving the world without people knowing... so evil of mi... wahaha...

Busy

hello... im back.... very busy for days... so tiring... but nvm la... dun noe wad happen to mi this few days... always keep lyk vomit... cough a lot... haiz... went to see her blog den realise that a lot ppl go scold her... my heart feel very hurt... it's nt her fault why scold her... this relationship cant blame anyone... haiz... she was forced to break up with mi... this one cant help de... haiz.. i juz wan to beg you ppl.. dun go and scold her le la... please... if you wan... i can kneel down to beg you ppl... i shouldnt haf say that she did nth... i really dun noe tt she did so much... and yet i shouted at her... wad is wrong with mi... haiz... i noe im busy... so busy to even blog or see ppl blog... haiz.. nvm... skipped.. driving lessons... attend 3 lesson... today went on road... instructor say i too gd le... den ask mi drive to clementi... lol... drive very fast lo... 80 km per hour... lol... but haf to slow down... haiz... skipped... this few days always go expo find guan ping... den go walk walk... looking for book which will cure illness... saw a few but no money to buy... im broke already... haiz... suddenly haf to support 2 ppl for their meals... haiz.. so used up my pay le lo... haiz... i will make sure they treat mi when they got their pay... sry for nt blogging well... i dun really haf the mood...

Life suck

can my life get worse den this??? so many troubles... all the stupid friends i had... i borrow money keep chasing mi for money... when they nid money... chasing mi to get money... WTH... nvm.... my bro.. this sun kena chase out of house le... how... finding unit for him.... overnight yesterday after class outing at sentosa... after outing... meet guan ping at my house.. den go guan ping house.. play with his cousin... den guan ping suddenly eat fire lo... go slap the cousin... aiyo... kids ma... sure noisy de ma.... haiz... kena sun burn again... fuck la... nvr tan my back also kena burn... tan front face kena burn... haiz... why bad thing are happening to mi one by one.... argh.. i hate this... to all those ppl who i owe... will return ASAP... but please la... i haf to work and spend it for myself right... and for those who owe mi money... im nt going to chase after you guys for money... take your time to return... i nt like ppl who is so fucking heartless who only think of themselves... especially P____!!!!

Tiring day

yesterday night there a 117 pax of Turkish friendship dinner... den im the food runner for banquet... i requested that i dun wan be bistro runner den stupid boss so put mi banquet runner... still can say i do banquet runner cause i haf more skills... lol... tired lyk hell... 117 pax leh... western somemore... argh... hand totally going to break le lo... run here and there... argh... 4 course somemore... when out the main course... my hand no strength liao den still haf dessert sia... den bistro finish work le so i call help lo... but i also do la.. half way through gt feeling that the tray wan to drop... walk damn damn fast till function room saw them ask mi faster help mi to take the tray... lucky nvr drop.... yesterday function room suddenly also haf a lot stuff when the belly dance start... aiyo... tray very heavy le still block my way... argh... wan to kill them lo... the dancer also nt nice la... still fat fat de lo... haiz... after the event finish... still haf to turnover for the next day function... argh... no strength le still haf to bring out the stage and round table... haiz... do half way... those who stay woodlands de all change le... waiting for mi... lol... den boss ask mi faster go change and go take cab with them... lol... no one tell mi and i still happy happy working lo... gt in cab... sleep till timah plaza there... reach home only... no one at home.. gt shocked... call my mum ask them where are they... they at orchard... lol.... midnight go see xmas lighting...

back

wahaha... im back... very fan this few days go close blog for a while... wont be posting so often le... take care.. will post when im free...

Ten Brothers

i finally finish watching ten brothers after 3 days of midnight... lao da and xiao lan one couple... lao san and tong tong one couple... as ten brothers are nt human... they cant be with xiao lan and tong tong... lao da dun wan xiao lan to get hurt that why he force himself to leave her... they go through a lot and they leave their parents... da xia like jiao er and they had go through a lot... although da xia scare that he will get reject de... but he continue to take care of jiao er.. love her... be with her for her every needs... is so touching la... i cry till my pillow got all wet... the two couple lyk one another but they cant be together... as they are from different world... i watch till i bring in my feeling lo... i cry a lot... because of my relationship... actually can be together but cant... haiz... dun noe how to say... maybe it my fault ba... haiz... but i juz think that no point hiding from her wad... so juz say out the truth lo... but end up.... haiz... nvm la... maybe im nt a gd bf ba... all i can do is wish her all the best... hope that she will find a much better guy den mi... willing to listen to her talk to her... dun end up lyk mi... talk till nth to talk... haiz.... anyway... im finding jobs... any one haf any jobs to offer please tell mi... anywhere i also dun care... muz haf free timing for mi to choose... cause if NUSS dun wan mi to work.. i will go there work... hours muz be long... pay rate above 5 per hour... thank you... if i can... i also wan to work midnight... so that i 24/7 working... hoping nt to think a lot... haiz... but will catch movie de... haha... but with who... haha... answer is... ALONE... wahaha... once a loner always a loner... haha... I HATE MYSELF... IF I CANT LOVE MYSELF... HOW CAN I EXPECT PPL TO LOVE MI... I DUN DESERVE PPL LOVE... NT AT ALL... i shall stop here and emo le... cant stop crying... juz now outside emo... mind totally blank... now at home emo... everything run through my mind... haiz...

Heart Pain Like Hell

back again... im here to do a survey... wad is more painful den heart pain... please tag mi with the answer... thanks you... haiz.. reach home only... go bath and online.. saw her offline msg... and her email... and heart totally very very hurtful.... like as if it had no more strength to beat anymore... haiz... if i had a choice i also dun wan to work today... but i had no choice... haiz... i did msg you when im out with my friends... although you waited so long for the msg... but i did bother to msg you... haiz... i already feel very hurtful when i noe the this friends of mine is going to leave mi le... juz because of MIC... haiz... nvm la... i did lose everything i had... when i gain one thing... i will lost a lot of things... haiz... but who care.... i also dun wan people to change because of mi... from the beginning i told you le... dun nid to change because of mi... haiz... nvm le la.. as you said... nt important anymore... haiz... and as i say... if you leaving mi will make you happier... i will let you go but of course i dun wan la... but styauing with mi will make you more sad and worry... haiz... until today... den i noe that NUSS suntec is a stupid place to had relationship la... guy haf wife and children and girl haf husband or boyfriend... but they can go out with another person in NUSS... haiz... stupid thougths they had... haiz.. and my bro is one of them... and i totally speechless or in fact... im also speechless... haiz... argh... i dun noe wad to type le.. cause now heart very pain... but nvm la... only readers of this blog will noe and i noe... i also dun care le la... nt anymore... i will try to be strong which i always failed... haiz... how la... something to think before i made my decision... should i put dun or do??? please tag mi for ur answer... that's for all... bye... and take care...